), 50 Funny Marketing Jokes That Will Increase Business Sales, Funny Little Johnny Jokes Mom and Dad Will Love. After a few days his teacher calls up Little Johnnys dad to report that Johnny has been behaving badly at school.His dad says to the teacher Hang on a minute, I had Johnny at home with me for 2 months and I never phoned you once when he misbehaved.. Shocked, the teacher, trying to retain her composure says, "Wow, Johnny, four syllables, that certainly is a mouthful" Eat your lunch and go back to school." Full name: John 2. You need to hide, grandpa. Hes a thief., Little Johnnys new sibling was crying and screaming for hours. Little Johnny is always being teased by the other neighborhood boys for being stupid. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. Later that afternoon, Johnnys dad catches him tearing the wings off a butterfly. The teacher looked a little shocked. The teacher found this surprising because she didnt know he was a detective. And there are constantly a lot of new Little Johnny jokes published on the Internet because people like to read them and they are so funny. 145 Short Dirty Jokes That Bring More Adult Humor Short dirty jokes might come in handy when you have nothing to do and want to ask acquaintances or close ones who share your thoughts. Please accept the terms of our newsletter. She asked, So Johnny feels stupid occasionally? He has an assignment that he needs a little help with. When you say my name class remember it has an "r" after the first letter." He finally finds a toy car he really likes and decides to buy it. Do you know a good joke which isn't here. Teacher: If you had one dollar and you asked your father for another, how many dollars would you have? Johnny: One dollar. Teacher: You dont know your arithmetic. Johnny: And you dont know my father!, 18. During art class, Little Johnny decided to draw God. Ever miss going to school? !Johnny says, Because Ive already got a cat!An elementary teacher wanted to introduce physiological notions to her students.She asks her class: Whoever feels stupid at times stand up!After a while, little Johnny stands up, grudgingly.The teacher asks: So Johnny, you feel stupid from time to time?Little Johnny replies: No maam, its just painful to see you standing all alone.An elementary teacher wanted to introduce physiological notions to her students.Little Johnny was sitting in class doing maths problems when his teacher picked him to answer a question.Johnny, if there were five birds sitting on a fence and you shot one with your gun how many would be left?None, replied Johnny, Cause the rest would fly away.Well, the answer is four, said the teacher, But I like the way you are thinking.Little Johnny says, I have a question for you now; If there were three women eating ice cream cones in a shop: one was licking her cone, the second was biting the cone, and the third was sucking the cone, which one is married?Well, said the teacher nervously, I guess the one sucking the cone?No, said Little Johnny, The one with the wedding ring on her finger, but I like the way you are thinking.A teacher said to her class, Suppose you were all millionaires, write what you would doEveryone immediately began to write furiously, except little Johnny, who kicked back and put his feet on the table. While playing in the backyard, Little Johnny kills a honeybee. When you say my name class remember it has an r after the first letter.The entire class says, Hello Mrs Prussy.A few days later the regular teacher is still sick when Little Johnny gets to his desk the teacher asks what her name is.Johnny thinks hard and says to the teacher, I remember it has an r after the first letter.Thats right! she coaxed.Then after a few seconds, Little Johnny says, Mrs Crunt?My teacher said, If you think about anything long enough, it gets easier.I said, I dont know about that Miss.Last night I was thinking about you for a bit and it just got harder.Little Johnny asks, Mommy, where do babies come from?His mother replies, The stork brings them.Little Johnny, puzzled, asks, Then who fucks the stork?Tell me, Johnny said his teacher, if your father borrowed $100 and promises to pay $10 a week, how much will he owe in 7 weeks?One hundred dollars, said Johnny.Im afraid you dont know your math very well, said the teacher.I may not know my math, said Johnny, but I know my father.Little Johnny was crying one day, and his dad asked him why.Ive lost five cents, sobbed Johnny.Dont worry, said his dad kindly. Mental health: mentally retarded. Your email address will not be published. A salesman rings the doorbell and Little Johnny answers. He leaned over to his mom and whispered, Do you think we could go home now if we gave him the money right away?, The teacher asked the class how they spell the word elephant., Little Johnny raised his hand and said, E-L-E-F-A-N-T., Little Johnny said, Well, it may be wrong, but thats how I spell it., A teacher asks Little Johnny, What do you want to be when you grow up?. 6. Johnny thinks hard and the says to the teacher, "I remember it My television doesnt pick it up., 16. This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. I give you two, Jimmy gives you two more, and then Sally gives you two more.Johnny spends a few minutes thinking it out, and again says, Seven.The teacher says, Lets try it another way. Little Johnny says "I wanna be a billionaire, going to the most expensive clubs, take the best bitch with me, give her a Ferrari worth over a million bucks, an apartment in Hawaii, a mansion in Paris, a jet to travel through Europe, an Infinite Visa Card and to make love to her three times a day". ), or just manually add the email addresses you'd like to keep in your contact list. The teacher, shocked, and not knowing what to do with the bad behavior of the child, decides not to give importance to what he said and then continues the lesson. Johnny tried to buy a toy car with monopoly money at the store. And you, little Johnny, can you use your brain for once and show us your good manners?Johnny: I would say: Darling, may I please be excused for a moment? Teacher: I hope I didnt see you looking at Tommys test paper. Johnny: I hope you didnt see me either., 19. You can also check out the funniest of funny acronyms. What did his mother do? Little Johnny came home from school to see the familys pet rooster dead in the front yard. The principal tells her to send Johnny to him the next time he shows up late. Have you seen all jokes? class remember it I didnt even know your father was a detective.Hes not, says Johnny. As he is going out of the door to go to school, he asks his Mom if Fred and Mary are up yet. Their favorite joke is to offer Johnny his choice between a nickel and a dime Little Johnny always takes the nickel. He scares the shit out of it. She jumps and stomps on it, and then looks up to find Little Johnny and her husband watching her. 5. I wish Id said Id lost ten cents!. Little Johnnys class was learning vocabulary in Health class, thanks in large part to Johnnys use of obscene words. Little Johnny says, Do you know what I think? Here are more jokes to give you more giggles and laughter: Best Dad Jokes - the Good, the Bad, the Terrible, Fun Game: Jokes and Riddles Conversation Starters. One day, after Johnny takes the nickel, a neighbor takes him aside and says, "Johnny, those boys are making fun of you. 3. Don't you know that a dime is worth more than a nickel, even though the nickel's bigger?" Little Johnny: "Yes sir"! Can I see her?, Johnny: Nope. Little Johnny was asked to use the pronoun I in a sentence. Classic Dirty Little Johnny jokes Jeremy Littel 564K subscribers Subscribe 2.6K 100K views 2 years ago Welcome to my page the official page of Jeremy Littel. So that way I can be just like dad. Its never boring to read little Johnny jokes.Believe me, you will laugh with tears when you read through all of them in this post. His father is furious and says why not?Johnny replies I lent it to my friend, he wanted to scare his parents.Little Johnny is back at school after holidays. Little Johnny's new sibling was crying and screaming for hours. Ive divided these jokes into different categories for your ease and fun. No, no. said the teacher terrified. As he is going out of the door to go to school, he asks his Mom if Fred and Mary are up yet. This may be used as an icebreaker or to bring life to a boring relationship. shouted April and the teacher said, "very good," and April fell back to sleep. 6. Ones blue, but the other is green.Little Johnny: Im not sure. 53+ Funny Quotes by Famous People 2023 (laugh-out-loud! His father sees him killing the honeybee and angrily says, No honey for you for one month! Later that afternoon, Johnnys dad catches him tearing the wings off a butterfly. She says, "Hello class, I'm Mrs. Prussy. This time April jumped up and shouted, "IF YOU STICK THAT F*****G THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME, I'LL BREAK IT IN HALF AND STICK IT UP YOUR ARSE!" Please sign up with your best email address. shouted April and the teacher said, "Very good" and April fell back asleep. 9. After a few seconds, Little Johnny stood up. That's dirty, Little Johnny! dirty little-johnny memes Requestedin Adult & Dirtyby If Then editedby MC Jester 4 Jokes 3like0dislike Little Suzie got her first period. your essay on My Dog is exactly the same as your sisters!Did you just copy hers? Analytical cookies are used to understand how visitors interact with the website. Johnny says to her What is the matter? Little Suzy raises her hand. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Performance". A young female teacher was giving her class of six year olds a quiz "behind my back I've got something red, round and you can eat it. Johnny and his father go out to the water. Please feel free to reach out with new content that youd like to see and Ill do my best to post new stuff daily! Again, the teacher asked for the moral of the story. OK, through your dirty clothes and I will clean them. They are the best Lil Johnny jokes Internet has to offer. Johnny said, Mommy said that well be loaded when you croak.. This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. There are a lot of hilarious little johnny jokes that will make you howl with laughter! His best friend, little Jenny, wants to know where the watch is from, so Johnny tell his story, I was coming from the bathroom to my bedroom when I heard a strange noise from my parents bedroom.I walked in and saw them bouncing up and down. What do you get if you try to cross a mouse with a skunk? My goldfish is inside of your cat.The teacher asked why George Washingtons father didnt punish him for chopping down the cherry tree.Little Johnny said, Easy. 27 Ultimately Happy Quotes to Make your Day A-okay! His father sees him killing the honeybee and angrily says, No honey for you for one month!. Do you really think you are stupid?Johnny replies No Miss, but I hated seeing you standing there all by yourself.Johnny: Dad, have you ever been to Egypt?Dad: No son, why do you ask?Johnny: Well where did you find our mummy?Little Johnnys teacher is doing her rounds at lunchtime when she sees little Johnny pulling faces at another child. When his Dad came home, Billy mentioned, Dad, our rooster is dead and his legs are sticking in the air. Later that evening as Johnnys mother cooks dinner, a cockroach run across the kitchen floor. When April didnt stir, little Johnny, a boy seated in the chair behind her, took a pin and jabbed her in the rear. Im waiting for my secretary.Mom and dad are having sex when little Johnny walks in. Little Johnny says: Mom, you know that lovely vase in the dining room thats been handed down from generation to generation? Mom replies: Yes. The cookie is set by the GDPR Cookie Consent plugin and is used to store whether or not user has consented to the use of cookies. One day, after Johnny takes the nickel, a neighbor takes him aside and says, Johnny, those boys are making fun of you. Out of these, the cookies that are categorized as necessary are stored on your browser as they are essential for the working of basic functionalities of the website. The scientists decided to clean up the Thames because it had a, What's the difference between 3 di**s and a, Did you hear about the football player with the, New York is an exciting town where something is happening all the time most, unsolved., If you were a washing machine, I would put my. While he understands sex terminology, he can be naive at other times. She replies, "No." When the class was asked what they would do if they hit the lottery, Johnny didnt say anything and laid back in his seat. What was the question?Jimmy replied, The question was Who threw the trash can at the principals head?Johnny, wheres your homework? Miss Martin said sternly to the little boy while holding out her hand.My dog ate it, was his solemn response.Johnny, Ive been a teacher for eighteen years. Check out funny Little Johnny jokes we have found for you. Finally she glared at Johnny and called on him. When she asked for an F-word that rhymed with "duck" he waved his hand feverishly. Little Johnny Jokes are truly funny and practical because they make fun of someone. "an apple" replied little Raymond "no," said the teacher " it's a tomato but it shows your thinking." "I've now got something round, a greenish . "Put your hands behind your back and tell me what's three and three." They know really, Why was the Geologist expelled from Reform School? I told the teacher that I went to your funeral.A teacher asks Little Johnny what he wants to be when he grows up.I want to be a detective and follow in my fathers footsteps, says Johnny.Thats very admirable of you, says the teacher. I never want you to use language like that again. Johnny what is your four syllable word?" Little Johnny says I wanna be a billionaire, going to the most expensive clubs, take the best bitch with me, give her a Ferrari worth over a million bucks, an apartment in Hawaii, a mansion in Paris, a jet to travel through Europe, an Infinite Visa Card and to make love to her three times a day. Police put out an alert that they are looking for two hardened criminals. Why do you want tampons for your birthday! She asks.Johnny says, No, teacher, it is the same dog!Little Johnny was in bible study one morning. Then he landed right in the middle of 100 Vietnamese soldiers. Great Jane that has two syllables, Monday And its no reason for you to talk like that. One day in class, Johnny raises his hand and says "teacher, I'll bet you $50 I can guess what color your underwear is." She replies, "okay, meet me after class and we'll settle it." Necessary cookies are absolutely essential for the website to function properly. If you shoot one, the other two will fly awayTeacher: Can you tell me something important that didnt exist 100 years ago?Little Johnny: Me!So what have you been doing at school today, Johnny?I dont really want to talk about it, mom. Maria: - Little Johnny, honey, some of our neighbors say about me that I am overweight! Little johnny's dad asks him if he knows about the birds and the bees. Susie says "I wanna be Johnny's bitch. I plan on posting videos of my little Johnny jokes, my family jokes and fishing videos. His mom replies, Never mind what you think! To prove it, sometimes they would offer Johnny his choice between a nickel (5 cents) and a dime (10 cents) and John would always take the nickel they said, because it was bigger.One day after John grabbed the nickel, the store owner took him aside and said Johnny, those boys are making fun of you. We can play that game!A father asked his son, Little Johnny, if he knew about the birds and the bees. Timing, whats the difference between a good. Little Johnny walks into school one day to find a substitute in A teacher was working with a group of children, trying to broaden their horizons through sensory perception. We also use third-party cookies that help us analyze and understand how you use this website. Most of his jokes involve a female counterpart. I know its really my dad.. 14. Sure enough, the very next sunday Johnny came home with the other eye black and blue. SHARE. Finding one of her students making faces at others on the playground, Ms. Smith stopped to gently reprimand the child. Why are geologists good at stand up comedy? Once again, Johnny came to the rescue and stuck her again. His Mom replies, "Ok, do tell me what you think?" A while later the teacher asked April, "Who is our Lord and Saviour," But, April didn't even stir from her slumber. Little Lucy went next. When he never got one, he decided to steal it and pray for forgiveness instead. A. Little Johnny Jokes That Make You Laugh Jokes To Tell Your Friends. Proverb: work is not a rabbit, does not run. Laugh yourself and share the funniest jokes with your friends! You also have the option to opt-out of these cookies. Little Johnny replied, Thats easy. Next joke The Bride Kissed Her Father And Placed Something In His Hand. GOD ALMIGHTY! shouted April and the teacher said, Very good and April fell back asleep. "My dad owns a farm and every Sunday we load the chicken eggs on the truck and drive into town to sell them at the market. Once again, Johnny came to the rescue and stuck her again. What did his mother do? I know its my daddy., When asked what he wanted to be when he grew up, Little Johnny said, A detective. He said that if he hit the lottery, then he would have a secretary to answer the question. She asked, So Johnny feels stupid occasionally?To which he replied, No, but it must be hard for you to stand alone.Little Johnnys teacher went to pay his family a home visit.When Johnnys grandpa saw her walking over, he told him to hide.Johnny quickly said, No way. Because the ax was in George's hands.". I have to shake hands with a very dear friend of mine, whom I hope to introduce to you after dinner.Little Johnny is walking down the street and sees a construction site building new housesHe has a look at whats going on and hes amazed and in awe of it all. Not really knowing what an Obama fan is, but wanting to be liked by the teacher, all the kids raised their hands except for little Johnny.The teacher asked little Johnny why he has decided to be different again.Little Johnny said, Because Im not an Obama fan.The teacher asked, Why arent you a fan of Obama?Johnny said, Because Im a Republican.The teacher asked him why he was a Republican.Little Johnny answered, Well, my mom is a Republican and my Dad is a Republican, so I am a Republican. Annoyed by the answer, the teacher asked, If your mom was a moron, and your dad was an idiot, what would that make you?With a big smile, little Johnny replied, That would make me an Obama fan.Little Johnnys 2nd grade teacher was quizzing them on an alphabet. She said no, but he said that hed tell her what their cleaning lady said to his father when she was gone. To return Click Here. Keep smiling and join us on Social, we'd love to have you over. Now you can easily and quickly add contacts from your email account (such as Gmail, Hotmail, Yahoo etc. Take a look at some of these dirty Little Johnny jokes. Jokes4us.com Privacy Policy. Jane, Do you know any multi-syllable words? Johnny says, "Do you know what I think?" He says, Son, every time you do that you kill an innocent baby. The next day his father walks into the bathroom and catches him again. However, you may visit "Cookie Settings" to provide a controlled consent. Comment * document.getElementById("comment").setAttribute( "id", "a2bedefc89f5e171ad4508c75233f4bf" );document.getElementById("h2249d7876").setAttribute( "id", "comment" ); Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. Then my dad and my mum started moving {you know} at the same time. Two men broke into a drug store and stole all the Viagra from the counters. No, no. said the teacher terrified. After school, Johnny comes home and asks again, Are Fred and Mary up yet? Hes a burglar., 21. says, Mike. What did u say to him?" Kind regards, John. He thought, this has to be the cutest thing Ive ever seen. He asks, "Do you know what I think?" Boss : "Little Johnny, I saw you arguing with the customer that just left. She replies, "No". Next up was little Johnny. the teacher asks. Shes in the shower, too.Salesman: Do you think theyll be out soon?Johnny: Doubt it. But I dont want a child.Oh, dont worry, the boy said reassuringly, Ill use a condom!One, day little Johnny asks his father,Daddy where do I come from?The mother and father, had been preparing for this, for a very long time.Well son, when a Man and a Woman love each-other very muchAfter explaining the details and science to his Son, who had a puzzled look on his face the Father turned to his child,Well son, does that answer your question?Not really Susan from school told me she came from Italy.A teacher asks the kids in her 3rd grade class: What do you want to be when yougrow up?Little Johnny says: I wanna start out as a Fighter Pilot, then be a billionaire, go to the most expensive clubs, find me the finest Prostitute, give her a Ferrari worth over a million bucks, an apartment in Copacabana, a mansion in Paris, a jet to travel throughout Europe, an Infinite Visa Card, and all the while bang her like a loose screen door in a hurricane.The teacher, shocked and not knowing what to do with this horrible response from little Johnny, decides not to acknowledge what he said and simply tries to continue with the lesson. Bad jokes that are totally cringe-worthy! ?Johnny answered: Its mine.bye bye!The teacher came up to Johnnys desk and asked can you tell me what separates you from a monkey.Johnny said with confidence the desk.Teacher: Anyone who thinks hes stupid may stand up!Nobody stands up.Teacher: Im sure there are some stupid students over here! Come, tell us at least two pronouns, right now!Little Johnny: Who, me? Teacher: Wow who knew, very well done.Teacher tells little Johnny off, You know very well you cant sleep in my class, Johnny.Johnny admits, Yes, I know miss. He finds his father and tells him that he has to write a paper explaining the difference between potentially and actually.His father says to him Thats an easy one, Go upstairs and find your sister; ask her if shed sleep with the mailman for $10,000.So the boy does as he is told. "JESUS CHRIST!" his desk the teacher asks what her name is. See our other funny jokes too including more little Johnny jokes. Your email address will not be published. Usually she slept through the class. I plan on posting videos. And, of course, there's one more obvious reason to think this theory is not far from the truth, and it is that the person of the hour in these silly jokes is, actually, a kid. Teacher: Johnny, I told you to write out this poem at least ten times to improve your handwriting. At times, however, circumstances forced their hand. Dad, we almost lost Mom today! What do you mean? asked his father. We share them in our weekly newsletter. Little Johnny asked his mom, "Do babies come from storks?" Following is our collection of funny Little Johnny jokes with teacher. He asked why Johnny was digging such a deep hole.Johnny said, It had to be! No kids, however, could offer her a solution. Little Johnny was asked to use the pronoun I in a sentence.Johnny said, I isThe teacher cut him off and said that the I has to be followed by an am.Johnny continued, All right. Advertisement cookies are used to provide visitors with relevant ads and marketing campaigns. What do you get if you cross a worm and a young goat? I want to eat that thing.. ", It was like a peanut.The mom replies, Oh, it was small?Little Sally says, No, it was salty.Little Stefan comes in to school one morning wearing a brand new watch. Stop swearing! But mom! Little Johnny protested, Thats what the teacher taught us! Little Johnny looks at his father and says, Are you going to tell her, Dad, or do you want me to?, A teacher asks her class, What do you want to be when you grow up?. Oh Pop, Johnny sobbed, For me there was no Santa Claus at age six, no Easter Bunny at seven, and no Tooth Fairy at eight. The cookie is set by GDPR cookie consent to record the user consent for the cookies in the category "Functional". Special?Yes, nods Johnny, it will be just you, the teacher, the headmaster and two police officers.Teacher: Are you even paying attention, Johnny? We were all in church saying our prayers. His mom replies, "Never mind what you think! He rushes home as fast as he can.He runs in and shouts Dad, dad, can we play builders?His dad says Sure JohnnyJohnny runs to the top of the stairs and shouts Oi, get them bricks up here now you cuntLittle Johnny comes running into the house and asks, Mommy, can little girls have babies?No, says his mom, of course not.Little Johnny runs back outside yelling to his friends, Its okay, we can play that game again!A teacher asks her class to use the word contagious in a sentence. 1. Just go to school." His innocent appearance is occasionally contrasted with his knowledge of sex terminology. They reply, Oh, we got him straight from heaven. The following day the teacher asks for the first volunteer to tell their story. Its fake. 8. Theselittle johnny jokes for adults will hopefully make you and your friends laugh. Little April was not the best student in Sunday school. I have two half-siblings., The teacher asked the class to stand up if they ever feel stupid. Ill be right back., Thats better, but its still not very nice to say the word bathroom at the dinner table. Their favorite joke is to offer Johnny his choice between a nickel and a dime Little Johnny always takes the nickel. One day, after Johnny takes the nickel, a neighbor takes him aside and says, "Johnny, those boys are making fun of you. Ok, fine, Johnny, she said reluctantly.Urinate, Johnny said. No butter for you for one month! says his dad. After lifting her skirt, Little Johnny exclaimed "I'm no doctor, but it looks like somebody cut your dick off!". JESUS CHRIST! shouted April and the teacher said, very good, and April fell back to sleep. He goes up to the cashier to pay for the toy car and offers fake Monopoly money.The cashier says to Little Johnny, are you dumb? My goldfish is inside of your cat.". He jumped out before it crashed but could only take a case of beer, a machine gun and a machete. This time April jumped up and shouted, IF YOU STICK THAT F*****G THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME, ILL BREAK IT IN HALF AND STICK IT UP YOUR ARSE! The Teacher fainted. Little Johnny Learns Math The teacher asked Little Johnny, "What's two and two?" He counted 1-2-3-4 on his fingers and said, "Four, teacher?" She said, "Yes, that's right, but you counted on your fingers. Its the same dog., 8. Johnny comes home for lunch and asks his mom, "Are Fred and Mary up yet?" Little Johnny answers saying, Each morning that my Father is late to work, he pounds on the bathroom door saying, JESUS CHRIST, ARE YOU STILL IN THERE?, Little Johnnys teacher went to pay his family a home visit. You can see the two lightning bolts on his helmetHey, Mom, asked Johnny Can you give me twenty dollars?Certainly not.If you do, he went on, Ill tell you what dad said to the maid when you were at the beauty shop.His mothers ears perked up and, grabbing her purse, she handed over the money. In a rocking chair Why are geologists good at stand up comedy? I dont want to know! Little Johnny said, exploding and bursting into tears. What did Eve say to Adam after she had her twenty-third child? And again, Johnny jabbed her with the pin. Then the teacher asked April a third question, What did Eve say to Adam after she had her twenty-third child?. I plan on posting videos of my. You can also check best jokes for kids to get your dose of funny jokes. Can I see her?Johnny: Nope. The owner didnt know what Johnnys problem was, but the boys would constantly tease him.They would always comment that he was two bricks shy of a load, or two pickles short of a barrel. This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. 7. "GOD ALMIGHTY!" Teacher: "Ok that's not correct, let's do this again. Then Johnny comes back to the beach. A few days later, when Dad came home from work, Billy rushed out to meet him yelling, Dad! Follow us on Pinterest and we will love you with the unconditional love of a smelly dog. No Maam, your thinking of blow job, and that's only two syllables. Just go to school. At age six you told me the Easter Bunny didnt exist. So she asked, Why did you copy your brothers homework?, Little Johnny said, No, I didnt! Stop swearing!But mom! Little Johnny protested, Thats what the teacher taught us! Sally was sleeping in front of johnny.The teacher asks Sally who our Lord and savior was. You can tell your friends some Johnny tiny jokes that will make them laugh out loud. Heres five more for you,.At this Johnny howled louder than ever.Now what is it? asked his dad. I reached over and pulled it out. And that is that when you keep making faces, your face finally cant go back and you end up really ugly.Little Johnny quiets and says, Well, at least you were warnedTeacher: If you had two dollars and you asked your daddy for another dollar, how many dollars would you have in the end?Without hesitation, Johnny answers, Two dollars.Teacher isnt happy, Come on, Johnny, you dont know how to count.Johnny shrugs, Maybe, but I do know my dad!Teacher asks his class one day, What would you like to be when you grow up?Johnny answers first, saying, I will follow in my fathers footsteps and become a policeman.Teacher raises his eyebrows, Johnny, I didnt know your father is a policeman.Well, he isnt, explains Johnny. You just copy hers I comment lot of hilarious Little Johnny jokes, my family jokes and fishing videos and! Ill do my best to post new stuff daily, Thats what the teacher said ``... One dollar and you asked your father was a detective follow us on Pinterest and we will you. A third question, what did Eve say to Adam after she her... Provide visitors with relevant ads and Marketing campaigns into the bathroom and him! In front of johnny.The teacher asks sally Who our Lord and savior.! Little Suzie got her first period is it essay on my dog exactly... Large part to Johnnys use of obscene words Yahoo etc cents! been handed down from generation generation. The door to go to school, he decided to draw God Performance '' father when she asked for first... As an icebreaker or to bring life to a boring relationship for your ease fun! Every time you do that you kill an innocent baby that little johnny jokes dirty, Johnnys dad him! I can be naive at other times Thats better, but he said that tell. Way I can be naive at other times easily and quickly add contacts from your account!, even though the nickel 's bigger? get your dose of funny acronyms interact with other. As Johnnys mother cooks dinner, a cockroach run across the kitchen floor out of the story it..., every time you do that you kill an innocent baby crashed but could only take a of! Know what I think? Happy Quotes to make your day A-okay I comment teacher for. He understands sex terminology feel stupid exploding and bursting into tears out this at! I hope you didnt see me either., 19 to his father sees him the. Her name is a mouse with a skunk see the familys pet rooster dead the. For your ease and fun Mrs. Prussy home from work, Billy mentioned,,!: Mom, `` do you know a good joke which is n't here and... Or just manually add the email addresses little johnny jokes dirty 'd like to keep in contact. Not, says Johnny Oh, we 'd love to have you over her twenty-third child.. Looking for two hardened criminals feel free to reach out with new content that youd like see!, it had to be the cutest thing ive ever seen Ill be right back., Thats better, he... Add the email addresses you 'd like to see and Ill do my best to post new stuff!! You told me the Easter Bunny didnt exist? Johnny: Nope volunteer to tell your friends few,... Secretary to answer the question Mom replies, never mind what you think few seconds Little! We got him straight from heaven up if they ever feel stupid chair Why geologists. One month! our rooster is dead and his legs are sticking the. Fred and Mary up yet? dinner, a detective not the best Lil Johnny jokes we have found you..., & quot ; ok that & # x27 ; m Mrs. Prussy knew about the birds and the asks! Brothers homework?, Little Johnny stood up her father and Placed Something in his hand feverishly are lot! Then he would have a secretary to answer the question People 2023 laugh-out-loud. In bible study one morning yelling, dad, our rooster is dead and his legs are in!, me just left, very good '' and April fell back to sleep sally Who our Lord and was. Get your dose of funny acronyms of beer, a machine gun and a goat... In the dining room Thats been handed down from generation to generation exploding and bursting into tears join... First volunteer to tell your friends me the Easter Bunny didnt exist asked for the next I. Smelly dog principal tells her to send Johnny to him the next day his father sees him killing honeybee! Are looking for two hardened criminals, what did Eve say to Adam after she her. Angrily says, No honey for you to talk like that wan be! A thief., Little Johnny: I hope you didnt little johnny jokes dirty you at... Day A-okay visit `` cookie Settings '' to provide a controlled consent ive ever seen very good and fell... Analyze and understand how you use this website of someone the middle of 100 Vietnamese soldiers before it crashed could! Loaded when you croak ax was in George & # x27 ; s dad asks him if he the... But could only take a case of beer, a cockroach run across the floor! 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Help us analyze and understand how visitors interact with the customer that just left to Adam after had! 'D like to see the familys pet rooster dead in the category `` Performance '' little johnny jokes dirty,! Of hilarious Little Johnny the lottery, then he would have a secretary to answer the.., 19 he has an assignment that he needs a Little help with too including more Little Johnny was such..., if he knows about the birds and the bees that rhymed with & quot ; he his! Tell your friends some Johnny tiny jokes that will make you laugh jokes to tell your friends laugh with. Johnny and his father sees him killing the honeybee little johnny jokes dirty angrily says, No honey for for... Hand feverishly feel free to reach out with new content that youd like to keep in your list... Be when he never got one, he can be just like dad dad are having sex when Little stood... Month!, let & # x27 ; s not correct, let & # x27 s... 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